Ayam Beg LAH~~!!

Translation : Ayam Beg = Chicken Bag in Malay - but it should be read as "I Am Back" in this context. [reference : my gal pal SL]

It's been quite some time since I last updated my blog; and this sqara (i still like to call her siew moi moi - gosh she even invented her own short form "smm" - sounds like double dose of SM to me hehe...) has been bugging me on when i'm gonna update it.. well sorry yeah siew moi moi, so here I am!

The past week has been quite a roller coaster ride for me - had a really down and sad previous weekend due to my bf not being able to accompany me, resulting me all alone with occupied frens who've got no time to entertain me, added up with some shit from my brother and even more money favours he's asking from my parents and my grandma... i really despise him man.. really do.. i've never seen any 'ta po kia' (son) like him, so to speak, as he is also the eldest and only male child in my family, as well as being the eldest male grandchild my grandma has (my granddad passed away long before i was even born); all i can see is, he's very much enjoying the fact that he can always take advantage of my grandma's male gender preference and hence, never failing to fuel him with money; and taking advantage of the fact that my parents will always help him out whenever he's in trouble financially (whether it's true or otherwise nobody knows). He's bought a freaking expensive house in KL apparently and now my grandma has already fueled him a whopping total of RM 23,000 to date, and God knows how much more he's asked from my parents, especially my mom.

Honestly, I am pretty upset about the whole buying house thing - if he's soo damn capable and sound financially, why can't he fork out the damn money himself with his gf's help? Why come to some 60 and 80 plus year old people and say 'look i'm buying a house show me the money'? Just doesn't make sense. It's already so bad that he hasn't contributed to my parents a lot over many years of his working life and even now he's still milking money out of my parents and grandma. And here he is, telling me things like 'if u can't afford to pay ur course fees then better for you not to study; if u can't afford a car then don't buy one yet; you must stay in a job and not quit yet until you find another', Fcuk him! It suddenly struck me : Why are you buying a house that you can't afford then? If you can't afford it, then better buy a cheaper one, rather than asking money from my parents and grandma. And I can so remember many years back when he quit his job in Penang just because he was madly in love with a girl who works and lives in KL; only to find himself jobless for many months; and how he insisted to buy a car eventhough he hasn't got enough money to buy it back a few years ago. Who the hell is he then, to come and give me all the shit, teaching me lessons of life? Pushing me to get a better job and pressuring me to finish off my studies soonest possible so I can take care of my parents and render him less burden? Arhhh.. Just freaking Fcuk off.

I have recovered from the trauma of his piercing words and how he's manipulating my family members to his own financial advantage, but forget i cannot. I just learnt to let go - as in putting it behind my mind and go along until things pop up then worry about it later. This is the only way i can remain sane.

Anyhow, 'nuff said about the sad stuff. Let's move on to something new coz him taking money from my family members are ancient old practice so there's nothing new about it.

I've promised siew moi moi (sqara) to post up scribblings on the PowerPuff Girls box tissues but have yet to do so - it's 12:43am now n i'm pretty lazy to take out my camera to take shots of the boxes - but I will, however, do it tomorrow nite and post it up here. It's kinda hard to post the pics though, coz all the boxes (4 altogether) have significantly different designs on every side of the box - I just don't know which side to take pictures of??!!??

On the sides, I remembered dreaming about my first ex-bf a few days ago and he told me about his studies and how he was struggling with it, even contemplating to give up (don't ask me why i dreamt of him and he's not even anywhere near to studying nowadays); and I can vividly recall how I advised him not to, encouraging him to have the heart and strength to carry on till he finishes the thing, and how I can totally relate to his agony in continuing his studies.. bla bla bla.. it was a pretty sad situation in the dream, i remembered, coz he looked quite down and we were seated quite close facing each other - come to think of it, I really think it was as if I was talking to myself, telling myself to be strong and endure the remaining laps needed to complete my master studies; and never to think of giving up no matter how hard and stressed I feel; coz my studies has always been in my mind every single second of my life, and I just cannot see myself holding a Master of Science cert in my hand - the image is just too blur.. the dream meant something to me, as if someone was trying to be Me and telling Myself to have faith and keep going, and as to why my ex bf appeared is still beyond my comprehension. I don't have anymore feelings for him other than friendship; and he's already married with a son now (Gosh! how time flies).

I applied for a few jobs online and finally got something reading 'Under Consideration' but I'm just hoping for 2 things:-

1. The employing company is firm and stable (as it was put up as 'Advertiser' only)
2. They are really keen on developing its employees and that includes giving people who are worth a chance to join their organisation

Anyhow I do hope for the better - every single day.

My day wasn't bad - I had lunch with my fren who drove me to the Rich People's neighbourhood - Jesselton where I saw for myself how the rich and famous lived - finely decorated 3-stories bungalows; Italian themed, palace-like mansions with huge garden and landscaping, etc.. etc.. I could hardly keep my mouth closed immersed by the sight of all the beautiful houses, imagining if I owned one of them and how it will actually feel like; along the way we saw a few unoccupied lands (obviously belonging to someone); and I asked my fren how much will it cost to buy this land, build a 3 storey mansion with the 3rd floor being able to rotate as well as having a glass roof so I can see the sky, also not forgetting to build a mini roller coaster ride on the sides - and he told me roughly 100 million will do - HAH! That was indeed the Joke of the Day.

Anyhow, later today my bf brought me to the famous 'Ship' for dinner and i thought my chicken soup was better than his mushroom - eventhough he disagreed; the garlic bread was quite nice and we had a great time yacking away about non-sensical stuff during our nearly 1-hour waiting period for the main course. We headed to Dome after that when it was pouring outside and my bf ordered a trial run of the new Dome Durian shake drink and he insisted that it must be made from durian ice cream blended with milk - but I had a few sips of it and the taste is really Durian-ish ok!! It's as if we are actually eating the durians! Really nice for people who appreciates the smell of durians... hmmmm I wonder if take aways of this drink will be allowed into Hotels ;)

Well it's way past 1 am now and I'm sleepy - chao